Let This Whole Town Hear Your Knuckles Crack

Dark Shadows (Burton, 2012)

In many ways I grew up loving the films of Tim Burton and he holds the most spots of any director in my personal Top 97 Greatest Films, so much so that all the recent attacks on him regarding his recycling and rehashing of material, no matter how illogical, unfounded, or simply talking-point-surface-level-dismissals without much credibility tend to bother me. They bothered me so much so that after seeing Alice in Wonderland in IMAX, a film that I found enjoyable but severely underwhelming considering that it followed up what I consider to be Burton's best film in Sweeney Todd and in comparison to his entire filmography, I wondered if some of these attacks were not entirely off point.

And then the trailer for his latest (of two 2012 releases) film Dark Shadows hit the internet a few months ago and I became worried. It all started out excellently, recalling Sweeney Todd, but then it indulged in comedy while "Season of the Witch" played loudly and I was puzzled. The jokes were lazy, the premise seemed thin, and it just left a sour taste. I should probably mention that I have no experience with the original 1960's 1,000+ episode series. Either way, as I walked in to the theater, I was afraid. Perhaps this was the turning point, perhaps Burton really has lost his way. Or perhaps, just maybe, I was fooled by another misleading trailer.

Every Superhero Need His Theme Music

Marvel's The Avengers (Whedon, 2012)

Only once have I attempted writing an extended fiction piece. It was a silly story that I hardly remember, but it was kind of playing on the idea of all the small events in a town that built toward some larger story in a Winesburg, Ohio kind of way. I kept losing track of the connections and eventually gave up, so when thinking about how Joss Whedon's Marvel's The Avengers attempts to fit together so many individual parts I can't help but be impressed by how much of it feels seamless. Sure there have been minor film crossovers, most notably Tony Stark showing up for a brief appearance in The Incredible Hulk or Nick Fury basically having his hands in every franchise film at some point. But often when all the pieces are assembled the result can easily feel inauthentic. For the most part Whedon's blockbuster gives all the heroes enough of a reason to join forces aside from the obvious "we would like to make money" mantra of Hollywood popcorn movies. All of the character groundwork has been, theoretically, set up, and Marvel's The Avengers is able to act like a grand sequel, but the thing about sequels is that many of them feel redundant, so how exactly does Whedon navigate this problem?

A Game of Thornes

Earlier this week I was invited to take part in a discussion of the latest episode of Game of Thrones with Kate Kulzick, Michael Waldman, and Simon Howell over at the SoundOnSight Game of Thrones Podcast. This historic event marks my first ever podcast experience, and it was great to have a bunch of friendly, intelligent people to help make the process enjoyable. Going in I was a bit nervous, and I think it shows a bit, but in the end it was a blast.

Taking On 2012: Top Films (Q1 Quarterly Review)

The month, it has been tough, but slowly the lights at the tunnel's end are starting to appear. Hot (or rather cold, as this case may be) off the heels of the Top Tracks and Albums of 2012 so far, come the best films I have seen. As I compiled me list, which is a bit paltry, to state things lightly, I discovered that I barely had enough for a Top list. This should not imply, my friends, that 2012 has been a bad year for cinema, just that the heavy hitters are still to come. I mean Cannes hasn't even happened yet.

If you really think about it, it's impressive that we escaped the doldrums with as many competent releases as we did. Even if, you know, some of them are cheats.

Taking On 2012: Top Albums (Q1 Quarterly Review)

Despite 2012 being a pretty great year for songs thus far, I'm going to come right out and say that, based on the limited number of albums I have listened to, it has been a pretty bad year for music. But, much like with other cultural forms of entertainment, I look toward the future and see that brighter pastures are ahead. With Japandroids, Beach House, Kanye West, Fiona Apple, and countless other artists set to release records in the coming year I can't help but feel hopeful.

And really the reason I do my Quarterly Reviews, aside from using them as an aid to keep track of what exactly I have listened to in the year, is to track how my feelings have changed. Unlike the past few years, I am not sure if my favorite album from the year has been already released, or is even on my radar. And that unknown excites me like a a kid who just won a timed shopping spree in Kay-Bee Toys.

But this isn't a most anticipated list. This is the present, and the present is a gift. So how about we get to unwrapping?

Taking On 2012: Top Tracks (Q1 Quarterly Review)

Where has the time gone? Down the critical drain, no doubt. And now that the time is no more it is time to begin the listing. Start the counting down. Organizing strategies. As it was written last year, it shall be written again. And again after that, until the future shuts us down and the electricity flows no more through these wires.

There has certainly been music this year, and some of it has even been pretty good. Of course some of it has been pretty bad too, but that's kind of the trade off, I imagine. But what's so great about music is, like a killer sammy from the local sub shop, you can pick and choose all the meats that make it in to the final product. And, naturally, kick the bad ones to the curb. I'm talking to you, mayonnaise!

So don't expect to find any mayo here, just straight up heaters. And you can even click on the links where possible to jam out on your own. I'm in your head.

Box Office Beatdown - March 19th, 2012

After the dearth of positive reviews, order has been restored to the world once more as a film that scored 'fresh' on Rotten Tomatoes actually topped the Box Office. Further validating the ways of the Hollywood system, it was naturally a quasi-remake of a licence that had been relegated to a throwaway punchline in another Jonah Hill film. Sometimes life imitates art, and sometimes art imitates life. And then we are all just living in the simulacra.

The notion that an R rated comedy could make money was dismissed years ago when Judd Apatow started smashing all kinds of records, but lately the quality of these more extreme comedies have been hit or miss in terms of critical reception. Now I have been watching a lot of Mad Men lately in anticipation of the season premiere, and if there's one thing Don Draper taught me it's this: people are attracted to nostalgia.

So of course we all want to return to the world of high school as adults, and now we can live vicariously through Channing Tatum. Or Jonah Hill, if that's your cup of tea. He is an Oscar nominee after all.

Aside from the top three films this week (21 Jump Street, The Lorax, and John Carter) everyone else fought over the scraps. Sadly, even with a box office as fractured as the GOP race (count it, there's another easy GOP joke coming up!), new film from Mark and Jay Duplass, Jeff, Who Lives At Home, only brought in $840,000. But even the big guns ought to cling to whatever cash they make over these next few days because the behemoth is on it's way come Friday when The Hunger Games releases. Big or small, we will all be consumed.

Check below for a full list of the films that will be rendered irrelevant at the hand of Suzanne Collins.